Been a rough night. Loud. Upset. I hate the yelling and the temper and the rage that threatens to overwhelm. I hate witnessing that and being fearful at the same time. I don't know what to do about it.
I get great images of the nephew and his beautiful smile and happiness and I want to be in that place so much. I try to equivocate and hide and stay calm but there's rage, too. I don't like victimhood. It's about survival. But not like this.
I am trying to be better about admitting what I feel. About being strong when I feel so weak. And that no one can understand because some things remain private.
Been a rough night.
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